A stroll

Good day today despite a lot of other things going on. This week I have done my quota of walks so really don't need to go out this weekend but I still want to. I want to keep going. That and a need to clear my head sent me out the door this afternoon. It was good. Different. Bordering on normal actually.

I ended up down the park and there was a football game on. So I stood for a while and soaked it up. No idea who was playing but I was more interested in just being there and not having to run away. Apologies for the crap photo but I only had my phone and as I didn't want to draw attention to myself took the photo shortly after I left rather than at the sideline.

I can't say I was impressed with the game but I was happy to be part of it in a way as a spectator and listening to the shouts and watching the battles. Just good to be immersed in something outwith home. Just good to be out.

Things are going really well but its in my nature built on recent years of experience to keep waiting for the fall that will send me all the way back to the begining. I am doing things I would not have imagined just at the start of the year and always planning a head to push further and longer and try to just steadily get there- to the end. And as I have said in recent weeks for the first time it really feels like it is possible. Even though my world is still small it has grown inch by inch and as long as it keeps growing then eventually, however long it takes, I will get there. Its a feeling I have not had in all the time since this first started. That alone builds a strength to push on and I think they are feeding off each other.

What I hope is that in the weeks ahead I have more positive posts. Maybe something impressive along the way- though to me all of this is impressive. I hope that there are tales ahead to tell of things I never dreamed. Better days. If it needs hard work then it is work I am willing to put in because these small pockets of normality in the day have been bliss and I long for more. For now I will take the snatches but over the weeks and months I really do dream they will turn into the promised land I have spent all these years searching for.