The Invisible Highwaymen

For the past year I have been taking control of my finances. I do all my banking online, put the figures in a spreadsheet and see where we could be doing better. Well I say I do it all online but as I said recently we have been putting by £20 a week which involves me going to the ATM and withdrawing the cash. Apart from that though its all virtual figure shifting. Online theft has been a worry of mine for a while because details can be so easily captured in so many ways but to be honest its mostly insured due to the trail any theft would leave.

Still though it was a shock today and log in into my bank account and find it had been cleaned out. Panic set in quickly and didn't go for a long time after. I was home alone with the boy while my wife took the youngest girl to her school induction. I was climbing the walls and not sure what to do. My head was spinning too much to think and I was shaking to much to do anything of worth. It was a literal state of shock.

We are quite lucky in some ways. We have a joint account in which we just about keep our heads above water. Its used for everything. Its used at supermarkets, online, petrol stations, bills, etc. When we opened the joint account I insisted in keeping a separate account. My idea was to save with this one and use it to transfer funds as needed for excess bills, car problems, house items or anything else out of the norm which needed extra funds. And that is the account I have been using for savings withdrawals too. I think that is what shocked me most as it was this account that was cleaned out. Unlike the other card it does have a chip and pin facility nor double as a debit card. So the only way to use it is physically in a bank or at a cash machine. Yet in 5 days a series of withdrawals had cleaned all of it it of our savings.

Being the way I am I know exactly what has happened. The card stays in my wallet until I use it for a withdrawal and I know for a fact my card has not been used. So the only other explanation is identity theft. To do that the details must have been swiped at the ATM and being agoraphobic I only ever use the one ATM- the nearest one pictured above where people are standing in line to take money. So last Wednesday afternoon when I lifted £20 from the bank unknown to me at the same time something was reading my details to empty the account later. Also unknown to me was that I was being held up by invisible highwaymen. They are professionals and I have been robbed by them.

So it led to the best part of an hour on the phone trying to calm myself while dealing with the anxiety of being stuck to an ear piece for so long and trying to convince not only the guy on the other end but also myself that it wasn't me who was the criminal. The case is now with the fraud time and although I don't expect we will see the money again I live with a bit of hope. Because its not an online crime how can I prove it wasn't me that withdrew the money? I know it wasn't me because it was taken from all over the county in different places but that is not something I can prove to the police if they ever come knocking. Since then the panic and anxiety have subsided with the acceptance that I cannot do anything about faceless criminals and instead the emotions have turned to anger which at some point I'll have to give in to acceptance too.

My mind has been filled with so many questions. Why didn't I check the online account sooner? Why didn't I withdraw money two days ago like I always plan to and then I would have been alerted to the fact that there was insufficient funds? That would at least have saved 40% of what was taken. But these questions serve no purpose now. And when everything calmed I had another thought, a rather eerie one. I remember when I took that money out last week thinking about this very thing- ID theft and cloning. I remember pausing and wondering whether someone had placed one of those devices in the card reader. Admittedly its not the first time I have had the thought but it is rare and having the thought doesn't mean I could have done anything about it but it was there nonetheless.

The hole in the wall actually belongs to a different bank from the one I am with. My wife went there tonight but it was shut. It had been her intention to make an enquiry about whether they knew if there had been thefts there. But she did notice the screen was not allowing transactions yet I used it today. So it may be that it is getting investigated but if it is no one is telling us and as this is a holiday weekend coming I doubt we will hear anything for a good bit yet.

Daisy chains

Sunburn requires two ingredients. There needs to be a big old burning white orb in the sky and the victim must be outdoors long enough to burn. Neither factor has met in my world for a long time. The weather hasn't been great and so I am never outdoors long. Yesterday though I sizzled but didn't realise it at the time until later when I saw my lobster red reflection. Apart from my stupidity it was great to be outside again. Though I do have to say too much heat made me feel a bit sick after. We spent all of three hours on our tiny patch which is the longest I can remember being out without climbing the walls to get home again. I suppose the fact I was sitting outside my home helped. The highlight of the day for the girls was the daisy chains they helped their mum make as modeled by my eldest above.

The kids are a bit hemmed in. The short video above shows how little room they have to play in. It looks quiet and for the most part it is but cars appear out of nowhere at times and at speed. We also don't like them wandering off too far. But its something. Its better than being stuck in the house. They have a good time regardless and invent their own play. Its very run down around here. There was something a little disturbing I noted up the street a bit which I should have taken a picture of. Over night a hole has appeared in the road. Its not wide but its deep. As I looked it I was amazed at gap. It looks like there is more subsidance around here than I suspected. A bit worrying that.

Lately I've had a question in my head about the cat: In his old age has he become nocturnal or is he another agoraphobic to add to the clan? Left to his own devices he will go into hiding at home and occasionally appear for food. Only come about ten at night or after will he appear again to go out. So on some days I have to throw him out and he reluctantly scuttles off out of sight but as soon as the door is open again he bolts for it and up the stairs into hiding once more. This was not helped the other day when a few boys were walking up the road with their devil dog off the lead. Recently I have noticed their are a lot of males with status dogs- pitbulls, rottweilers, etc. Anything that looks menacing and up for a fight. So our old cat appeared and this dog went for him. As I lept up I half expected the cat to be thrown about and torn to shreds but he wasn't having it. He stood his ground and went for the dog with claws bared. The dog got a fright as did the owner who quickly gathered up his dog and went off. The cat's heart was beating so fast when I picked him up and put him back indoors but credit to him. Five minutes later the boys were back down the street with the dog running free again. They might have been looking for round two, maybe lost a bit of face. Old cat though was safe indoors and I'll leave him there during the day if he likes as I now see he has good reason to stay at home.

Amazonia

Today I had an overwhelming urge to visit Amazonia, a small indoor rain forest with tropical animals. It was the itch I am incapable of scratching. The agitated want of something beyond my grasp, at the moment. Fuelled no doubt by a monthly photo competition I enter in the hope of winning a new camera. This month the theme is wildlife and the gallery is littered with the beauty of natural world. From the vulnerable to the deadly, from the small to the large. There are underwater snaps of fish to lions in the grass. A huge assortment. Not only did it indicate that this is a theme I have no chance of competing in but also it gave me a taste for what I am missing, things I long to see beyond the bricks and mortar. I'm sick of the same old drab scenery and long for something new to look at.

Looking through the images I have taken from the last year, all photos have to be taken with a particular brand of camera for the competition, I could find only insects, birds and the occasional swan. Its a pretty lame collection in comparison so this month I will have to content myself with the old adage that "its the taking part that counts and not the winning". A little ladybird, garden spider or distant swan will be slid into the pile when no one is looking. Not to worry. Next month its a different theme.

The photograph above was taken four years ago next month on my oldest daughter's third birthday. Up to that point there was a trend I had forgotten about and also forgotten how much I miss it. On her first birthday we took her to Deep Sea World where she wasn't old enough to appreciate the wonders that her father was lapping up. Pirhanas, various colours of frogs and the underwater tunnel to view the sharks and other fish. For her second birthday we took her to Blairdrummond Safari Park which contains enough wildlife to keep me occupied. Every animal you can imagine in a zoo but with the freedom. We went on a little boat to watch chimps on a little island, walked over a wooden bridge to view the bears playing in the water, got up head height with the giraffes and so many other things. It was a really good day out, that is one place I do miss. My wife had been back there twice with the kids and other family for various things but it didn't cross my mind at those times just how much I was missing out.

For my daughter's third birthday as I said we went to Amazonia. I was glad. Anxiety had changed from being an irritation to being more of a burden. We only had to drive 5 minutes from the house which was fine, at the time. The walk though from the car park into the complex I found difficult as I had this urge to leave and was getting very uncomfortable. You go up some stairs into a big area and into the centre of this complex which houses a pub, a burger bar and rows upon rows of fruit machines which are blaring out their tunes. Then its out into the open air where all the park rides are and the music is so loud that the ground beneath trembles and your body shakes to the bass. Finally after more walking you reach a little building, go down some stairs, through a reception area and arrive in a large intensely hot breathless room filled with tropical animals and plants. I remember there is one area you go into which I think contains bats and the curtain you pass through to it is a mass of leather strips. You push through into a dark dank room filled with the smell of stale sweat. And after all the viewing, which doesn't take long at all, there is the long road back to the car. Doesn't sound appealing but for me its the nearest at hand. And still I want to go there. That isn't going to happen between now and the end of the month but it will happen again and when it does I will know I am on the right track.

That was the last birthday day out I participated in. My youngest daughter celebrated her birthday the following month but we didn't go out. And we, as a family, haven't gone out since. Its something I want to change and Amazonia seems the best place to start. Its not about a competition now but for the benefit of us all. Rationalising it I think to myself its too far to go and its too long to stay out. When I was looking though those photos for something that resembled wildlife I found ones from the loch next to Amazonia taken at the end of last year. I then noted that the time between the first one I took and the last one I took was nearly an hour and I had been walking about that whole time. So it is possible even if that stronger voice keeps telling me it isn't. I can type that but can't seem to believe it or at least not enough to dominate that doubting voice. Maybe only by doing it will I be able to shut it up. Something to aim for anyway.