Breathing problems today and for the past few days. When I got up this morning I noticed it straight away and that set the tone for what has been one long day. Again I will say its not hyperventilating or labouring or wheezing. It's like a dry intake of breath into a shrunken lung. That is the best way I can describe it. A restriction of some sort. But then for all I know in this anxious mind it may be more of a perception rather than an actual problem.
About 2 hours before my parents were due to arrive I had a panic attack- the mildest I've had. It was so mild I was able to tell my wife about it during the attack and after half an hour although very tired the attack had gone. It started with trembling and progressed from there. It was started without a doubt by my mind shouting all morning that I cannot breathe properly. This was exhausting, worrying and agitating me. Then I was getting a draught from the window which I think started the panic.
I got through it though better than usual. Then I started to feel ill. Ill like I have a virus. My stomach feels like the cause, I'm bunged up and just generally feeling ill. The kids have been a bit iffy lately with coughs and high temperatures so its not unusual that I with my low immune tolerance could pick something up. Then last night and today my wife complained of a sore throat. My throat doesn't feel so good either which could be a reason why the breathing feels unnatural.
So I think I have a virus and hopefully that is what it is. My one worry there would be a chest infection as I cannot go to the doctors. It has though made me think which is hard. This is all confusing. Diagnosing with anxiety in the mix is difficult. I thought "What if ?".
I've been reading about acceptance as the means to overcome anxiety. That is to say basically look at your symptoms, accept them as symptoms of anxiety and over time they will go. What if though its not anxiety? What if I am lying to myself? What if I have a chest infection which is getting worse and I'm trying to fool myself all the while that its just anxiety? What if I am suffering for no reason when a dose of anti-biotic would sort me out? This is the confusion and this is why ultimately it is so hard to accept.
