1998

Saturday 21st of February 1998,

This is my life- so far dull and looking none too more eventful but a life just the same. I am aged 26 years old, 6ft plus, 12-14 stone (been a while since I weighed myself, have rough sallow-ish skin, brown unkempt hair, squint front teeth,  hazel eyes and Scottish by birth. My voice- for the deaf – is a low, bassy growl that occasionally whines. Maybe that’s good enough reason to be unmarried and childless at this late stage in life but I can’t say I’m unhappy- more confused and frustrating.

I am alone in a flat in Perth, Scotland- although I have a flat-mate at present that has gone home to visit his wife. After years of writing and discarding diaries I have decided to start another one again. These introductory paragraphs have been written many times before by myself and now are lost in trash and dust but this time I plan to keep a chronicle of the mundane and maybe some of the exciting- though can't promise anything. This is as much a notepad for thoughts and ideas as it is a diary but will be primarily the latter.

As I said I have a flat mate- for the moment. It was actually him who got this flat and I joined him. We work at the Insurance place in IT  and used to travel 60 miles up and 60 miles back each day from the home town so as contractors who contract for 6 month to a year at a time it made better sense to rent for the duration. Ive actually been in this job just over 7 months but I have been assured by the agency and by my on site manager that there will be work for at least another year and most probably beyond. You never can tell though. For the moment its good. Good people where I work. Most of them like to socialise which is great. Great money. Though the money gives me a headache because being a contractor I also had to set up a Limited Company so the money is not readily available and I have to get an accountant to do the books every year.

Can't be bothered with that to be honest. Much prefer going to the cashline and seeing what is available. Feel most of the time like I can't touch it. But truth be told I have very little need for it at the moment over and above food and rent. Being single and spending most of my time working means I don't have a lot of outgoings.

The only downside to living up here is I miss my friends. I miss when Friday comes and I am not heading down the local back home to see my mates. I don't see them much any more because I don't have a car and travelling by train and bus is not worth the hassle. I don't need a car and can't see me driving while I am up here. It only takes 15 minutes to walk to work and most morning someone stops and gives me a lift up which is one of the perks of customer facing in a building homing round 2,000 people. So I miss my friends but it does help that there are so many sociable folk up here but unfortunately most a good bit older and married.

I don't feel lonely at the moment probably because I have a flat mate and we tinker with PCs and networking and nerdy stuff like that. But as he has just found out his wife is pregnant for the first time I think they'll be wanting to get a home together up here together and then it the loneliness may hit home. Though not for a while. I quite like the idea of having the freedom of living alone.

So that is about that. Not exciting stuff. Might get better in a few months. The work has a trip planned for the World Cup with a bus running all the way from here to Paris and coming back the same day. I have been talking with some friends from back home who are going and thinking I might stay over there and meet up with them at some point. So that could be quite an adventure. I've never been to Paris before and would love to go. Will see how much of the language I remember from high school. It should be fun.