Jarred

Little girl, I know how you feel. I feel it too. Battering on the glass trying to smash it to escape. Feeling trapped. Jarred. Just like Wee Jimmy. RIP Big/Wee Jimmy who was found on a Monday morning passed away at the tail end of last year. Been feeling restricted this week. More so that usual. Probably because I have been pushing more than usual just have my face pressed up against the glass with that obscured view of what lies beyond. I remember times like these. I remember I passed beyond them. Patience young, aye right, man!

But God I did try, believe me I did. I went out one night to hear noise echoing side to side. A loudspeaker. Lots of high pitch sounds. Dance music. Walked a bit. Lights. Lots of lights. Tried to capture it but not quite. Got closer. Who's that weirdo from afar with the camera? Jeez, as close as I could get. Face pressed against the cold glass of the jar wanting to get closer, wanting to run home. And that is about the size of it.

Just two pics this week, not much doing. The first my daughter asked me for. Not great and could be a lot better with a bit of time worked on it but I took it as far as my interest and patience would allow. I get a photography magazine every month which always has tutorials for manipulation and also includes people's attempts from previous issues. My daughter saw a girl in the jar in the latter but I didn't have the magazine for a tutorial so had to play around after nodding me he to: Take a picture of me like this dad and at the weekend, if you have the time of course, you could put me in a jar. If only- shouldn't say that. Be careful what you wish for.

And that big old funfair type thing had me intrigued and frustrated at the same time. Wanted to get closer. Just couldn't do it. Not that I couldn't physically get closer, I could, but all the while in my deranged head I was counting the steps and how many more it would take to escape back. You need a right steady hand for those sort of things, not ideal when shaking with panic.

Anyways a better week. On the up I feel. But slowly. And that is OK if I can show some patience and realise I have little choice.



Lastly just one other thing. If you are wondering why the pics of late look so grainy its not the wee old camera- though it does now produce a black spodge in the top corner so has to be cropped. Its the lack of light here. Even in daylight there is not enough natural light. Its not great. It makes for less sharpness and more noise in a little compact. But still no nearer to affording something better. Halfway there but think I'll need to wait until my 50th to make up the rest so making do in between.