The fact that I went further in one direction is not the point here. Its the fact that having done so not only was I not fighting the urge to turn back but I was actually fighting the urge to push on. Normally when doing graduated exposure the first goal is to push out to the line in the sand. Second on the list if the first is achieved is to cross that line. Third and final is to push within reason as far as possible. Like being tied to home by a bit of elastic as I have said before. This time though it was like the elastic had snapped and the only thing holding me back were the recent demons of doubt.
I pushed on into Bothwell on Monday to a point I have not been for a few years. And it was OK. And really part of me wanted to push on further. I am glad I didn't. 5 minutes later I had a crash. The power and energy just went. It was hard enough where I was but 10 minutes further out could have been a disaster. But there are good signs there. These little glimmers of hope happened first time around unexpectedly and led to bigger strides. I feel it is happening again and that feels good.
The photo above was taken in woodland in the way back. Strange I saw my first deer for a while but it was not like others. I actually thought it was a boxer. It was the same sort of colour but by the time I had my phone out it was gone. I have never seen deer here. So many new expensive houses are being thrown up here that I fear the deer have nowhere to go.
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