Overnight

Standing frozen in a car park of a Holiday Inn at six am talking to an Irish couple I had never met was not something I had planned to do or will ever plan to do again- the couple were lovely but the rest was a nightmare. There is little to be gained by thinking fate has it in for you but that is how it felt. August 2006 was the last time I had been out of home overnight. In my drive to undo all the wrongs that led me to my lowest and darkest places I am slowly passing everything I passed on the way down  but this time on the way up.  An overnight was needed somewhere.

My wife and I had discussed it many times but always including the phrase "one day" with not much conviction from either side. Even when  the kids broke up for school it was never a proposal as so many other things less difficult had yet to be attempted. But I had an idea. Last year my sister-in-lay took my oldest girl to Italy and when she came back she stayed overnight at a Holiday Inn in East Kilbride taking my other daughter. This year she did the reverse. It was dropping off the oldest that that idea came to me. My wife and I had always talked an overnight in terms of just the two of us. It didnt have to be. We could book a family room. When I suggested it my wife was taken aback. Things were moving quicker I think than she expected and after giving up to some extent on me ever getting better after the last CPN left I think she found it hard to take in. A few days later we went in and booked it.

It was hard without a doubt. Not every minute but the vast majority of it. But I expected that. I could expect no less. 9 years of the same journey to bed and same bed and waking in the same room was about to be disturbed. That led to apprehension. It was expected.

We had gone down to have dinner in the restaurant but the kids didn't see anything they liked so instead we went out to McDonald which was a shame as the meal at the Inn was supposed to be part of the experience. I should also say something I found really humbling. We never told the kids we were doing it. We told them that I had never been away for 9 years so I was going to have an overnight on my own and they came with me to see me off. After getting the room key my wife told them they were staying too and it was amazing. You would have thought they had been told they were getting 3 weeks in Disneyland Florida not an overnight in East Kilbride- and I bet their joy was more than some kids who were going over the water. It as humbling and a bit sad to see  that such a small thing was massive for them and a push to ensure they miss out on no more. That alone made it worth while.

Not a lot else was done. They had all been out at Blair Drummond safari park all day and were caught in a traffic jam on the way home so we got there late and my wife was shattered. We had a few drinks at the bar and then watched some TV in bed. Then lights out.

That was the bit I was dreading and it lived up to the hyped.  Lying in darkness the mind hit top gear and had a full tank to burn. Left side, back, right side, front, left side and so on. Its true that the more yoy try to sleep the less like you are to drop off. A dozen or so checks of the phone didn't help to check the time. 5:12, that was the last one I remember. Left side, right...

I basically was awake the whole time except for about 50 minutes where I did finally sleep but was awoken with the loudest alarm I have ever heard. Or maybe it just seemed louder going from silence of deep sleep. So that was that. Me, my wife and the kids were all  down in the car park half asleep and cold. My son just had a pair of PJs and was shivering so I gave him my jumper leaving me in just a T-shirt. No idea what the cause was. We were never told. The fire brigade were there but there was no smoke. A note under the door to apologise but it hardly made up for ruining our one night away. We were at least up in time for breakfast which was nice all around the table together. And after that the rest of my family went to the indoor pool. I had gone into town the day before and bought swimming shorts for it but by that time i felt ill. As they swam I lay under the covers and fell asleep for a couple of hours. Finally a sleep away from home.

It didn't go to plan but it would be pretty boring if it did. Its not me fate has it in for though. My family went up North yesterday and today when I called my wife told me they had been at the cinema  to see "Inside Out" when three quarters through the fire alarm went off.  That kind of bad luck is just not funny. The film had to be put back to the beginning but they could not stay as their cousins had to be elsewhere so they never saw the end- but did get a full refund. 

That wasn't the end of our day though.  We went to Bothwell Castle which we have done numerous times but this time went inside. My wife had a card from her work giving us discounts on things. For entry we went free so just had to pay for the kids but as there were renovations on the kids went free so it was a total freebie. And after that we spent a while at the museum of rural life. That was great. As we waited for a ride up to the farm in a carriage pulled by a tractor a deer appeared in th nearby field. The friendly tractor driver told us all about the family who were locals and the bumpy ride was great. That is a train, a tram and a tractor in the past week. Can't think of any other transport beginning with "T" to go on. The kids loved seeing all the animals and we arrived in time for milking. The guy was a really nice woman and the farmer's wife came out to chat too which was nice. So a good day out all in all.

As I said he overnight didn't go to plan but it didn't matter. To be honest I never planned on it being an enjoyable experience. The kids didn't care and loved it. For me it was just about getting it done and now that it is done I will do it again. Not straight away but I will do it some time soon for sure.