It took me a while to first venture to the shops after lockdown started. Quite how long I can't remember. Partly like everyone else the thought of infection was a concern but mostly it was because at one point it was only one person per household. What really stopped me though were the weeks when queuing ran around the block. We are lucky enough that we can see the front door of our local ASDA from our window so now can go when the queues are gone- to be fair queuing appears to be a thing of the past now. Those waits though were not for me. Someone 2 metres in front and same behind wedging me in. No physical barrier but still I felt trapped enough not to do it.
One night when the rules were relaxed me, my wife and middle child waited in the queue. I was determined to see it out. But I didn't. Seconds felt like hours and I felt compelled to move where there was nowhere to move to so instead agitation grew and grew. It took me back to the start and standing in that meeting room at work unable just to stand still and listen before finally fleeing. Standing or sitting still while doing nothing should be easy. How hard can it be?
Shopping now though is back to normal. Maybe too normal. People in the main are ignoring social distancing in our shops and where floors read 'no entry' even staff move through them. You get the impression no one is afraid any more like they were in the early days. Even at the front door people enter through the exit unchallenged because they cannot be bothered taking the long way around to enter properly and safely. Personally I'm not sure where I stand any more. It's very surreal.
