Time flying past too fast at the moment. Only yesterday did I finally order presents for the kids' Christmas not realising its only 2 weeks away. With age our wants grow. I lifted up the 3 A4 sheets of scrawls to work my was through the lists to Santa with Amazon and other sites. Really I do not miss the days I found myself in a mobbed city centre standing for ages in a queue and running from pillar to post trying to get all the presents together for the following day. The lists varied greatly. The 9 year old girl had filled in both sides of the A4 sheet with the writing getting smaller as the list went on and then managing to create virtual columns to add more items as if the space had to be filled. The 7 year old girl filled half one side of a sheet in larger lettering. The 4 year old boy, with the help of his sisters, wrote down to things: Lego Batman for the Wii and Lego Batman 2 for the Wii. As I said our wants grow with age or maybe just for that period of our lives, I am not sure. The boy would be happy with anything. As a result he was the hardest to buy for as I really couldn't think what to get him.
My wife and I have always been of differing opinions when it comes to present buying whether it be for Christmas or Birthday. She maintains the opinion that the more they have and the bigger the things are then the happier they will be and to some extent she is right. From that moment they walk into the living room and see the large piles of wrapped presents right though until they are all opened and the paper is left strewn everywhere they are in dreamland. I don't deny that. But what after? I've always been more of the opinion that even if they are disappointed with the size of the pile they will in the long term be happier with something more suitable. But I always relent. This is why her parents have two bikes and a trampet in their shed virtually unused. Its why I keep tripping up going down the stairs over 3 unused scooters. It is why for a long time a mock big bulky kitchen took up one side of our living room for long period of time. Its why last years cardboard wendy house that you colour in yourself lies abandoned and folded in a corner of the bedroom. Its also why in the dark of night when I am the last to bed I stand on some toy going into the bedroom. Outside our room is their toybox which has been shut for many months and not only full to the brim but cannot be seen beneath a mountain of other unused toys sitting on top and around it usually spilling into our doorway. Its a small flat. There is no storage space. Unused bulk in my opinion is a bad idea.
But this year its mostly the same again though my wife is starting to see that most of what we buy for the kids ends up a long time at the charity shop virtually as good as new and in the inbetween time just takes up space we don't have. If i had my way it would be different. If it was up to me the kids would probably be devasted when they came through looking for a mountain of presents to find a small pile. The the oldest for example. A list full of dolphin related items like plush dolls, posters, books, etc. A dolphin faze. Me? I'd get her a few little nick nacks and as a main present something like the Kindle Fire. As disappointed as she would be on arrival I think by the end of the day she would be happy. She loves playing with my wife's phone with the various Android games. She loves listening to music and writing and Internet browsing. To have a decent tablet and take it wherever she wanted I think she would be happy. We have though compromised. Half the expense roughly going on one main item and the other half being made up with smaller items they want like DVDs, CDs, computer games and like toys.
As I said time flies by. I'll have to now rack my brains as to what to get my wife who is really difficult to buy for. Its been about 3 weeks since I last posted and in that time my 41st birthday passed. A bit of a damp squib but that's the way birthday's are at this age usually. A card will always suffice but I was a bit disappointed that I was given gifts from my wife's side of the family and ignored by more own. Didn't even get a card from my parents as my mum forgot to put a stamp on it. Just another year to add on to the others.
I am still trying to build my walks again but its taking much longer than I would have liked. There is no steady rising line on the graph. Its up and down like a yo yo. One day I'm able to start progressing and the next I am struggling to get out the door. Just like at the start of the year. All it took was a two week lay off to wipe out 10 months of work. But I will get there again.
Obviously its not helped at the moment by the weather. My wife insisted on getting me ice grips which I can't telling her I didn't need but she finally got anyway and when she did the ice disappeared over night. The reason she wouldn't take no for an answer was because of my own stupid stubbornness leading to a little accident. My oldest girl needing to be picked up from her club 2 weeks ago and I have been doing that of late. But that night I forgot the time and had to rush out the door. Rather than staying to the main path which was icy enough underfoot I took a short cut down a red ash path that doesn't get any sunlight. It really was Bambi on ice and before I knew it after a valiant struggle to keep my balance my legs just went from under me. Knees hit the solid surface first, then shoulder and finally face. I felt my teeth dig into the lip and when I stood up I was sure the inner lip would be cut- it wasn't. But I struggled with the walk to collect my daughter after that. My right knee was so sore that I had to limp and was struggling to put weight on it. When I finally got to her she looked shocked and asked if I was OK. Why?, I asked. You have blood all over your face, she replied. I put my hand to my face and true enough lots of blood. Turned out I had multiple cuts on my chin. For days after my body was really sore. Especially the neck, shoulders, upper back and upper arms. So my wife insisted I henceforth where the ice grips she bought and this time I am listening.
Its not an exciting life with lot to tell as you will no doubt have gathered. The highlight of these last 3 weeks and cause for much excitement was something others would find quite mundane- a new toilet. Yes finally the kids can flush a toilet without asking their parents to do it and they loved it. Yes- they loved having a new toilet. The youngest two have never known a toilet that flushed. Ususally my wife or I would have to stand and rapidly yank the handle until it would finally flush. That is all the kids have ever known. So they would get told off when they were elsewhere for not flushing but that was not their fault.
Still not getting out with the camera. I waited so long to get it and since getting it have never used it. I think this is mostly down to the car being out of action for so long. I don't like take photos in my surrounding area and to be honest I have taken all there is to take. I can't walk further afield. So I need the car and maybe then I can get back into photography again which has been on the back burner for a while. As fate would have it at the moment the battery is dead on the car but hopefully we can get a new one soon and start getting out and about it again. When we were doing that it helped my mood enormously and I felt when I was in a better mood the fatigue was not as bad. That is the way it seems to work. Like in the past when I had to get through something like a visit with all the apprehension before hand, panic during and then when over a big burst of energy and confidence sending me out the door further than before. Finally later a crash of tiredness sending me to sleep. When doing the drives my mind started to put the bitty map together and came to the comforting conclusion that the world wasn't that big at all- places at hand were not a thousand miles away as I had thought.
Anyway, I'll get on. After a walk this morning and a spot of lunch I feel like sleeping again but ever reluctant to. Can't afford to. As empty as my day is as a whole there are always things strategically placed within in at that ensure I cannot crash out and a racing mind that wouldn't allow me to anyway. I've been neglecting this blog like I have been putting off a lot of things in life. Time to start doing. Actions rather than words.
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